Note: This post first appeared in 2017 but has been updated. The first three to seven years are the formative years in a child’s life. During this time you are building a foundation for the character of your child. Your child will not be able to reason until around age seven. This means your focus should not be on reasoning with your child, but training your child. A child below the age of reason does not choose to obey because they love Mommy or because the Bible says they should. They choose to obey because they…
NOTE: This post was originally published in 2017. What image does the word “Discipline” bring to your mind? Spanking, the naughty corner, scolding? Here is what most of us think: Discipline = Punishment. And most of what is called discipline is punishment. But good discipline is more than punishment. It’s about prevention rather than cure. The purpose of discipline True discipline is about teaching your children to be self-controlled, to obey you, and to show respect for authority – yours and God’s. It’s about teaching them to surrender their hearts to God. True discipline reaches children’s…
NOTE: This article was first published on January 4, 2017, but has been updated. There are many reasons parents avoid discipline: It doesn’t seem to work. It’s unpleasant. It’s easier to let the kid have its way. They feel guilty when the child accuses them of being mean. It doesn’t feel good. After all, who wants to make their kids cry? Sometimes we avoid it because of the way our parents disciplined us – harshly or not at all. Maybe the problem wasn’t the correction but how …
Note: this post was originally published on December 6, 2017, but has been updated. What life skills do your kids have? Do you know which ones they don’t have? Some things can make a huge difference in life – like getting that job or not, improving a relationship, or saving money because you can do it yourself. Here is a list of skills to guide you in preparing your kids for life – these are things they should know before they leave home: People Skills How to start a conversation with a stranger Healthy boundaries in relationships – not allowing yourself…
Tackling chores is not at the top of my favourite-things-to-do list. I’m pretty sure it’s not at the top of any kid’s list either. While researching this topic I read an article by a mother who does not give her kids chores because she wants them to have a happy childhood. Her reasoning is that life is going to be full of chores once they reach adulthood and why should her kids endure the hardship of chores before then? Is this mom doing a good thing by not expecting her kids to do chores…
So your child is now a teenager and you’re noticing some rebellion. They tend to back chat you, spend more time alone, are embarrassed by you, argue more with you and generally resist your authority. What happened to your pleasant pre-adolescent? How can you navigate these turbulent teen years? How do you deal with a rebellious teenager? What makes a teenager rebellious? It’s a biblical principle that we reap what we sow. And the teen years are the reaping years. Generally speaking, teenage rebellion is a reaction to bad parenting. Ouch. I know that hurts. It’s…
Do you ever stop to think about how you are doing as a parent? How would you rate your parenting skills? One of Richard’s most common sayings is, “Apply your mind”. Are you “applying your mind” to your parenting, or are you drifting along without much thought? Becoming a better parent takes being intentional. Applying your mind. One way of doing this is to conduct a parenting audit. To evaluate what’s working and what’s not, and how you can improve. What is a parenting audit? A parenting audit is an intentional review of all the areas…
Do you wish you were a better parent? Have you made mistakes you wish you could undo? Do you struggle with impatience, sometimes yell at your kids, and wish they would just listen to you? It’s no light thing to raise a child, and the irony of it all is that you begin without knowing how and by the time your kids are grown, you’ve finally learnt how to parent, but by then it’s too late because they’re grown up! But wait! There’s good news! No matter what your track record looks like, you can…
One question we get asked frequently is, How do I get my kids to listen? The Bible is clear that children should obey their parents, “Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right.” Ephesians 6:1 (KJV) But how does that happen? Do children naturally obey their parents because the Bible says they should? Umm, we all know that doesn’t happen. So whose job is it to ensure that children are obedient? The parents’, of course. So, the next logical question is, If kids aren’t obedient, whose fault is that? Yup, the parent’s. So…