Being a mom can suck the life out of you – you get so involved with caring for your kids and doing daily routines that you forget who you are. You forget you used to enjoy music. You don’t know what you like anymore. You feel out of touch with the rest of the world. You’re a shell of your former self, unable to think or talk about anything other than earache, diaper rashes, and how to get your kids to stop arguing. But underneath your mom hat lies a head full of dormant ideas, dreams, hopes, interests, and…
Do you ever feel tired of being a mom, and wish you could just “check out” and have a break? Do you feel guilty feeling that you want some alone time, away from your kids, without responsibilities? Let’s face it, “Momming” is a demanding job. It’s 24/7/365. There are no weekends. No public holidays. Even when your husband takes over for a bit, your mind is still engaged with your kids. You may be in another room, but you’re still wondering, why is he allowing them to make so much noise? or why isn’t…
Have you ever felt like you aren’t doing a good enough job as a mom? You feel you should be doing more with or for your kids, you worry you’re damaging them in some way, or you long for a break from them – but think you shouldn’t feel that way! Mom guilt can make you miserable! How can you stop feeling this way? What is mom guilt? Mom guilt is the feeling that you have done something wrong that will cause harm to your child. It usually arises from the feelings of not being able to…
What makes a child feel loved? In my opinion, it goes beyond taking care of their basic needs – food, shelter, safety, education, clothing – it’s when they know they are seen, heard, and understood. Feeling unloved can have long-lasting effects on your child, and if you’re like me, you don’t want to cause long-term damage to your kids. But, I get it, you’re a busy Mom (or Dad), and you want to meet the needs of your kids and make them feel loved and valued. How can you do this when your life is…
Is it wrong for Christians to have strong negative emotions? Because the Bible speaks against anger, hatred and other strong emotions, we often cover them with a veneer of cheerful Christianity while they churn beneath the surface like Mount Etna waiting to erupt. While I believe throwing tantrums is not a healthy way for a child to express emotion, I don’t believe we should teach them to shut down their emotions and not express them at all. Read about tantrums here) Shutting down strong emotions may seem like a quick solution, but it’s counterproductive. What’s wrong…
Let’s talk boundaries with kids. As the parent, you are responsible to help your child learn healthy boundaries with themselves and the people around them. “Children are not born with boundaries. They internalise boundaries from external relationships and discipline. In order for children to learn who they are and what they are responsible for, their parents have to have clear boundaries with them and relate to them in ways that help them learn their own boundaries.” Boundaries with Kids, 18 Cloud & Townsend The basics of boundaries is to have routines and schedule. A morning routine, a daytime routine…
Don’t we all want our babies to just sleep without us having to rock/bounce/shush/sing/breastfeed for an hour (sometimes hours!)? Well, that’s how I felt, anyway. I had one easy baby, one very colicky baby and another fussy baby. I never knew anything about sleep training back when my kids were born, but as I look back I realise I actually did sleep train. When our daughter was born we lived with Richard’s parents and did not have a room for the baby. In my ignorance I rocked her to sleep every…
Should you allow your kids to sleep in your bed with you? Recent studies indicate that a near epidemic proportion of children are co-sleeping with parents today. Around 45% of moms let their 8- to 12-year-olds sleep with them from time to time, and 13% permit it every night. One of the reasons parent’s allow co-sleeping is because children today have higher levels of anxiety than previous generations – higher divorce rates, frequent transitions, over-scheduling, more academic pressure, and constant media connection (no time to be “off-line”). So, because so many parents are allowing…
No matter how conscientious we are as parents, we all make blunders from time to time – like giving consequences for something our child didn’t do. (Yup, got that T-shirt.) We may feel awful about occasional slip-ups like this, but they are less serious than the mistakes we repeat consistently. 8 Parenting mistakes to stop doing Here are some parenting mistakes you may be making without realising it: 1. Repeating instructions and making threats Do your kids only obey once your voice raises a notch, your eyes narrow, and you use their full name? If so, you’re…
