In their book, The Act of Marriage After 40, the LaHaye’s share a joke: [i] The following are the three stages of a couple’s love life- Couples in their twenties have sex triweekly. Couples in their thirties try weekly to have sex. Couples in their forties, fifties, and sixties try weakly to have sexual relations. Those of you crossing the threshold into the middle-age years, don’t believe a word of what you may hear about your sex life dying. It won’t die (unless you let it), but you will have to adapt to the changes…
Are you ever confused by your spouse? Why does she never initiate sex? Why does he always want it? (Sometimes it’s the other way around…) Why does this apparent incompatibility between men and women exist? Why didn’t God just make us the same? There’d be no arguments or misunderstandings about sex if both men and women related to it in the same way. God designed men and women to respond differently to sex for a reason: To teach us to communicate, to serve each other, and to seek understanding of the other. Instead, we don’t communicate…
After I wrote last week’s post on why you shouldn’t say “Everything happens for a reason”, I got to thinking. It’s all very well to listen to someone and support them, but what if they only want to use you as a dumping ground for all their woes? They argue about every solution you offer and refuse to think more positively about their situation. In essence, they’re a “help resistor”. And, if you allow them to continue it will put strain on your relationship and drain you emotionally. How can you help…
We all know people who are going through a divorce, a spouse is dying of cancer, or they’ve lost their job. Because it’s really awkward and we don’t know what to say or do, we often make two errors – a) we do nothing because we’re afraid of doing the wrong thing, or b) we say things that are well intentioned but not helpful. Like, “Everything happens for a reason”, or “These things come to teach us lessons”. What’s wrong with saying “Everything happens for a reason”? First of…
Let’s face it, having kids is demanding – physically and emotionally. This, together with all the other pressures of life, puts pressure on your marriage. And the first thing to suffer is your sex life. How do you keep this part of your relationship alive when you are too tired, too busy, too stressed? By being intentional. You have to find ways to make sex happen, or it won’t. 10 Ways to make sex happen when you have kids Here are some ways to be intentional about investing in your sexual relationship as a couple: 1.Schedule sex. While…
How important is physical touch in relationship? Is there a correlation between the level of touch and the depth of the relationship? A behavioural scientist named Desmond Morris became interested in why some couples stay together for life and why some divorce. He studied many couples and found that the ones who stayed together had followed similar progressions of intimacy, leaving sufficient time before advancing to the next stage. He figured that this gave the couple time to sufficiently bond during each phase of their relationship. 12 stages of physical intimacy In his book, Morris suggests there are 12 stages…
Are you the parent of teens, young adults, or adult children and wondering how you can impact their choices and decisions? They are growing up, or grown up, and you don’t have control over them anymore. And that can be tough! You wish you could step in and tell them what to do and how to do it, but you can’t. However, this doesn’t mean you have lost the ability to influence your kids. There are still ways you can positively impact their lives. Let’s take a look at the four ways you can influence your…
Have you ever had someone tell you their “deep and darks” when you hardly know them? Maybe you’ve come away from a conversation with someone you don’t know very well and felt that you’ve overshared. How much should you share with someone at the beginning of a relationship? Should you spill your guts so they know what they’re getting into? Why shouldn’t you tell too much too soon? Telling your deep and darks requires a relationship that is reasonably solid. It must be able to bear the emotional weight of sharing deep things. This strength…
Should you thank your kids when they obey you? “Come here to Mommy. Thank you.” “Put your toys away. Thank you.” “Don’t touch that. Thank you.” Why do you thank people? Usually when they have done you a favour or done something nice for you, right? Is obedience a favour or a duty? What does the Bible say? “Children, obey your parents in the Lord.” Ephesians 6:1 That sounds like a command to me, not an option or a favour. Related: How to get your kids to obey in 3 easy steps Obedience is a child’s duty…