Emotional Health

Toxic relationships, self-care, personal growth, boundaries, emotional health.

Focus on Yourself Series: Developing Yourself

A few months ago a friend and I had a conversation about how to overcome distraction and stay focused on a task. She really wanted to start doing better at it. Do you have things you’d like to change about yourself, things you’d like to learn, and areas you need to grow in? If you do, that’s a good thing because the Bible encourages growth.   2 Peter 1:5-8 makes God’s intention for us clear: grow so you can be fruitful.   “And beside this, giving all diligence, add to your faith virtue; and…

18 Signs of a Toxic Relationship

No one purposely takes poison – even in small amounts. We know it’s stupid. But we often stay stuck in toxic relationships that make us mentally and emotionally sick and sometimes even destroy us. Toxic relationships can happen anywhere relationships occur – with a child or parent, in dating or marriage, with a friend or in a work environment, and yes, even in church. Recognising a toxic relationship can be difficult because we may be so used to mistreatment that it feels normal. The toxic person can make us feel like we are the problem. And naming the toxicity can…

How to Improve Low Self-Esteem

Self-esteem is the way we think about ourselves and the value we place on ourselves. When we have healthy self-esteem we tend to feel positive about ourselves and life in general, and we’re better able to deal with life’s ups and downs. When our self-esteem is low, we tend to see ourselves and our life in a negative light and feel less able to take on life’s challenges. Low self-esteem often stems from experiences in childhood that lead us to believe negative things about ourselves. These experiences could be things like: Being bullied…

How to Declutter your Life

Are you tired of feeling overwhelmed by your cluttered home? What about your emotions? Your life? Clutter is bad for your brain and bad for your health! It can make you feel stressed, anxious, and depressed. The visual distraction of clutter increases cognitive overload (fills up your mind space so you can’t think clearly). I never realised the impact clutter was having on me until I started decluttering. I immediately felt my mental health improve!   What happens when you declutter your life? Researchers have found that clearing clutter from the home and work environment resulted in a…

What to do if you are in an Abusive Relationship

Brenda and I went to school together and I attended her wedding way back when. She glowed with happiness as people pinned money to her wedding gown at the reception. It all looked so perfect, but I didn’t know she’d be stuck in an abusive relationship for years. Brenda stayed stuck because she felt unworthy and like the abuse was her fault. She forgave and forgot countless times, hoping things would get better. They didn’t.   Her husband was addicted to pornography. Brenda broke the videos when she found them. He watched porn at work or other people…

How to Start a Difficult Conversation

Is there a conversation you’ve been putting off because it’s too difficult or you don’t know how to get started? Maybe you’re angry with someone for something they did or did not do you feel guilty or embarrassed about something you did you need to confront inappropriate behaviour you need to share something you see needs adjustment in the other person Difficult, awkward conversations crop up everywhere. Why are difficult conversations so hard? Difficult conversations can be hard for a number of reasons: You hate conflict You’re afraid of saying the wrong thing You’re…

8 Ways to Build Trust in Relationships

All healthy relationships are based on trust. Without it a relationship will not flourish and grow, nor will it have the emotional intimacy that creates genuine connection. Importance of Trust in a Relationship The more you foster trust in your relationship, the safer you will feel. Without this sense of safety it will be very difficult to connect emotionally.   And emotional connection requires deeper revelation of yourself to your partner. It’s hard to maintain a long-term relationship when the only thing keeping you together is the surface-level stuff. Please note: The following suggestions are for those…

Time Management for Christians

Is time management and productivity important for Christians? Is it only for high-powered business people, or does God care how each person manages their time? Why we should be concerned about how we spend our time We should be concerned with how we spend our time because God is concerned with time management. The parable of the talents in Matthew 25:14-30 illustrates how God expects us to make good use of the gifts He has given us, and time is one of those gifts. Romans 14:12 says, “So then every one of us shall give account…

11 Ways to Overcome Fear and Anxiety

Life has always been too big for me. A burden. Fear has been my constant companion. I have been afraid of people, of exams, of dentists, of dying, of suffering.  of leaving home, of giving birth, of talking to strangers, of answering the phone, of daily living, of losing my children, that God won’t keep His promises. Afraid.  Always afraid. Paralyzed by fear for most of my life, I learned to bury it deep. On the surface I was bright, cheery, and cheeky. But the fear was there. And it kept me from being happy. It made…