Love & Marriage

Intimacy in marriage, sex, communication, boundaries, and romance.

14 Things Not to do When You’re in a “Fight”

Every relationship has conflict. Whether it’s a marriage relationship, parent-child relationship or a work relationship, there’s going to be conflict because there are two people involved, both with different perspectives. Since conflict can’t be avoided it needs to be managed. How are you managing conflict in your relationships or is it going unresolved? Are you frustrated with your relationships because they are just not working? You may be doing some things that are making your conflict worse without even knowing it. 14 things NOT to do in a fight: 1. Don’t involve a third…

How to Reignite the Passion in your Marriage

Do you want to reignite the passion in your marriage? Is it really necessary to maintain the spark? Definitely! Just because you’ve been married for 10, 15, 25, 35 years, doesn’t mean you can’t have chemistry in your relationship. In fact, the state of your sexual intimacy indicates the state of your relationship. Sex is the canary in the coal mine. Let me explain. Miners used to place a canary in a cage inside the mine to alert them of the presence of deadly gases. If the canary fell over dead, the miners knew to get out…

4 Ways to Develop Spiritual Intimacy with Your Spouse

I’ve written about 4 Ways to Grow Intimacy in Your Marriage before, but today we’ll be looking at one aspect of intimacy – spiritual connection – and how to grow it as a couple. Only a secure connection with your spouse will build a marriage that lasts. But there’s more to connection than talking and touching. Aside from the physical and emotional elements, we also have a spiritual dimension. This is the one couples often skip – either because it’s non-existent or because they don’t think it’s important. But, it’s…

4 Ways to Increase Intimacy in Your Marriage

Have you lost the intimacy in your marriage and want to bring it back? Do you take each other for granted and long for the closeness you once had? Do you have a level of intimacy but long for more? Can you regain intimacy in marriage once you’ve lost it? Absolutely! What is intimacy? According to google it is close familiarity or friendship. Something personal or private.  Marriage was meant to be a place of knowing and being known – like no other knows or is known.   A place of friendship and close familiarity.  Achieving intimacy…

How to have Devotional Time with God as a Couple

The foundation of a Christian marriage is Christ. It makes sense then, that Christian couples should spend time with God – as a couple. Sadly, the spiritual side of many marriages is neglected and couples miss out on a huge bonding factor for their relationship. Sharing spiritual thoughts and praying together automatically brings a couple closer together and creates intimacy. But, reading the Bible and praying together can feel really awkward at first – because it’s actually quite an intimate thing to do. It can also be hard to find the time for couple devotions because you’re balancing careers, kids…

How to Let a Guy Know You Like Him without Appearing Desperate

How do you let a guy know you like him without coming on too strong? I was raised with these ideas drummed into me: Don’t chase guys.   Wait to be pursued and don’t show interest unless a guy has clearly initiated first. Being too friendly is cheap. I wasn’t sure if it was wrong to smile at a guy I liked, make eye contact with him, or talk to him. Was I supposed to ignore him and hope that somehow he would notice me? The fuzzy line between friendly and flirty left me confused, guilty, and…

How to Tell the Difference Between Flirting and Friendliness

Do you struggle to tell the difference between flirting and friendliness? How do you tell if someone is flirting or just being nice? Not being able to recognise the difference often leads to being hurt because you thought the person really liked you and had a genuine interest in you.   Flirting happens to both single and married people and it can be hard to tell the difference because they’re so close. It can also be difficult to know how to be friendly without flirting. I’ve seen naturally friendly girls mistaken as flirts, and I’ve also…

How to Control Sexual Desire before Marriage

Is it wrong to have sexual desires before marriage? Absolutely not! God created physical attraction as an exciting part of romantic relationship. God created sex to be a healthy part of the marriage relationship. He designed it to be a bonding experience between a man and woman that connects them physically, emotionally, and spiritually. The trick is to keep it under control until the right time. The natural progression of love is for it to be expressed physically at some point. However, God designed physical touch between a man and woman to be the catalyst for sexual intimacy and restraining…

8 Ways to Boost your Wife’s Sexual Desire

I recently received an email from a man with this question: “My wife complains that during sexual intimacy I don’t speak words that boost her desire much. I just repeat the usual words, “I love you”. It’s like I have a limited vocabulary. How can I include more variety in what I say to my wife and boost her desire?” Great question! Let’s dive in and figure this out. First, let me say that a woman’s sexual response is a little more complicated than a man’s. It’s not a switch…